Marcia-God, Dicko and the other dude to exit stage left.

This might be the final nail in the COACM coffin. While COACM was more than this, losing the epicentre of ridicule will be too much to bear.

But 'I think therefore I judge you' is coming to computer screens near you. It won't happen overnight but it will happen.

Love McLove,
Kid A

2009. It's hard to go past this as the best part of the year.

My fellow citizens:

I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank President Bush for his service to our nation, as well as the generosity and co-operation he has shown throughout this transition.

Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms. At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because we the people have remained faithful to the ideals of our forbearers, and true to our founding documents.

So it has been. So it must be with this generation of Americans.

That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. Our nation is at war, against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age. Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our health care is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet.

These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. Less measurable but no less profound is a sapping of confidence across our land - a nagging fear that America's decline is inevitable, and that the next generation must lower its sights.

Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America - they will be met.

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.

On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.

We remain a young nation, but in the words of scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted - for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things - some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and travelled across oceans in search of a new life.

For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and ploughed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.

Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions - that time has surely passed. Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.

For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act - not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth. We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together. We will restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology's wonders to raise health care's quality and lower its cost. We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age. All this we can do. And all this we will do.

Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions - who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short. For they have forgotten what this country has already done; what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage.

What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them - that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply. The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works - whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end. And those of us who manage the public's dollars will be held to account - to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day - because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government.

Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control - and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favours only the prosperous. The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our Gross Domestic Product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on our ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart - not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.

As for our common defence, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our Founding Fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience's sake. And so to all other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born: know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman, and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and that we are ready to lead once more.

Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.

We are the keepers of this legacy. Guided by these principles once more, we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort - even greater co-operation and understanding between nations. We will begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people, and forge a hard-earned peace in Afghanistan. With old friends and former foes, we will work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat, and roll back the specter of a warming planet. We will not apologise for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defence, and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you.

For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus - and non-believers. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth; and because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation, and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.

To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect. To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict, or blame their society's ills on the West - know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy. To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.

To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds. And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to suffering outside our borders; nor can we consume the world's resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it.

As we consider the road that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who, at this very hour, patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains. They have something to tell us today, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages. We honour them not only because they are guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service; a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves. And yet, at this moment - a moment that will define a generation - it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all.

For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the firefighter's courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent's willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate.

Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends - hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism - these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility - a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation, and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task.

This is the price and the promise of citizenship.

This is the source of our confidence - the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny.

This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed - why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall, and why a man whose father less than sixty years ago might not have been served at a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath.

So let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have travelled. In the year of America's birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river. The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood. At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people:

"Let it be told to the future world ... that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive ... that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet (it)."

America. In the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children's children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God's grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations.

The power of zoom is a beautiful thing

Under the kangaroo - an interesting take on Minter Ellison's way of doing business.

ARGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Did you know?

That I am bored. I am not a good bored person. Probably one of the worst.


I have to do things, not just be surrounded in them. I like action, not inaction.

Reading the Internet, buying tickets to summer festivals, looking at buying books and t-shirts ---which is really a must with the dollar so strong---are done, done, done.

Now what?

I am so bored, I am not even inspired. I had several strands of things to blog about halfway into the can in China/Bali but now they have slipped out of my tiny bored little mind.

The task I have set for myself to occupy the next 2 minutes is to memorise how to spell Lake Chargoggagoggmachauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg. It is a reaaaaaal place. I am not making it up!

What an ungainly moniker if I ever saw one. Needless to say, this water body had the longest place name in the US. I say had because they have since changed the name to the more tongue friendly Webster Lake.

Chargoggagoggmachauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg means the fishing place at the boundary between territories.

Quite fetching.

So I shall test myself on the spelling of Lake C later today. It will help slow the brain rot.

Apologies to the fans that have been waiting for something brilliant to send their nethers into the land of sweet, soft tingles. It is coming. Watch this space!

Barbie's fun house.

The ultimate pleasure palace.



Kid A: Wo xiang mai ma. Duoshao quian?
Owner: Zhe bugui. Yibai million yuan.
Kid A: Tai gue le.

Surfin' on a rock-ette with Idol.

Last Sunday was allegedly a display of 11 singers belting out some rockin' rock hits. I don't know about you but I thought it was the musical equivalent of a herd of cows depositing collective runny foecal output after gorging themselves on a particularly large grassy meadow.

*Sigh*

It soon became clear that I heard better renditions of the salt and pepper in the rock recipe - Jet and Muse - the last time I was at Charlton's.

But here we are. After last's week fairly solid set of performances, I thought these puppies were thrown down.

I think you'll find that these were merely placed here

To open proceedings on rock nite, we kicked out the suburban sweetheart, Ashleigh. She was in the bottom 3 along with Jimmy Donovan and Christian Tim. Kid A's tipping of 2 out of 3 was not bad. Not bad at all.

The judges were a little sad about this with the exception of the Marcia-God. She was wearing a fashion tribute to her favourite band, Banarama. Her face was puckered tightly and so she looked like a stone gargoyle. Perhaps too much botox this week sister-girlfriend?

Our special guest this week was Suzi Q. We drove down Devil Gate Drive... in a horse and cart. What was particularly scary about this performance was Suze's leather coated camel toe. I think she needed to say goodbye to the spray on onesie in the mid 90s and the moul-et. The hair took up half the stage by itself.

You don’t do rock n roll – it does you;
similarly - you don't do mullets - they do you.

Given things were so lacking musically, I will not dwell on the performances too long. Perhaps the distinct absence of a porcine prince or princess is what's to blame? Confucius say: shallow pipes do not maketh the rock lord.

1. Hayley Warner Bros - she did work it. Sadly it resembled a Yooralla ad more closely than a video clip.
2. Jimmy Donovan - well, let's not talk about the singing because words can't describe how lame and shithouse it was. However, did you see the bevy of tatts adorning his buff arms? The most interesting one was on his inner right arm. I swear I saw three chests from the Totem Treasure slot machine. Is your gambling ruining your life? I think so. Please don't ruin mine any longer!
   
3. Kate was 'under' Cook-ed. Query her true sexual preferences - man, woman or cow?
4. Nathan put the brakes on his shimmies (thank God). There is a lot more left in his Idol tank though so he'll be baaaaaaaack.
5. Toby did turn into a beetroot when he mused his way through Starlight. The band was shocking. Horrendous. The textured sounds of that song were being played from a little kids Casio piano... or the back of a Tibetan tin bucket.
   
6. Tim was worst on ground. He tried very hard but yeah nah. Soz. It's a pity that moths ate his shirt in the green room backstage too.
7. Sabrina Teenage Witch unleashed another round of screech. There was some emotions and tears and blah and blah. Not too bad. Kudos from the judges
   
8. James is like a chia pet - he grows about a mm each week. I did like this. He reminds me of Peter Pan.
9. Scott is so comfortable, he starting off dozing on the stage. The DJ scratching during this song was just embarrassingly bad. The singing was average. It's a good thing he's so hot. He'll get through to next week.
10. Kim - would you stop singing like you are an American - Cooper. Act your race please.
11. Stan - you brought Metallica to Idol. A+ for attitude and effort. But you are sadly, not a patch on James Hetfield.

Bottom 3 is likely to Jimmy 'One Eyed Jack' Doona, Praise the Lord Timmy & ... possibly controversial... Nathan Brakes Plus.

Next week we have Mr Goodrem join us. Please tell me the theme is going to be... TV jingles. Yeah!

The possibilities are exciting:

• Doors Plus, no fuss.
  
• Go Harvey, Go Harvey, Go Harvey Norman! Go!
• Around the block, 13 cabs... 13 cabs, 13 cabs, 13 cabs
• Lubemobile, the mobbbbbbile mechanics
  
• Victory, victory, the winning blinds, 13 13 99
• Clive Peeeters, e, e, eeeeeasy
• Keep your eyes open for a barrrrrgain, CAR CITY!
  
• Come in and see the good good good guys, pay cash and we'll slash the prices
• Ray's Tent City, come see what we've got, from tents to barbeques, we've got the lot
• And my personal fav: Call call carpet call, the experts in the trade

Ta ta.